How to get away from memories of people that meant the world to us? You'd probably think "What kinda shit is Akira gonna write about this time?" Yes. This kind of shit.
"HE MEANS THE WORLD TO ME" ARC
When you think that someone is everything to you, you'd do anything for that person and yet to him, you're just some piece of dirt stuck in between his shoe sole, something he's trying to get rid off since the first day he knew you. You know this already, you've been asking people around you, telling them stories, pissing yourself with all the negative things and yet you still cling to him like you'll die when he leaves you (Correction: he can't leave you unless you are together right?). I think, unless you were in a relationship with the dude, for a year or two, then you'll get the license to howl as long as you want, as loud as you want and you can even turn yourself into a banshee, if you want to. But as long as the guy does not 'belong' to you, is not in a relationship with you, eventhough he treats you like a mistress, YOU ARE ONLY FRIENDS. Please. Keep. That. In. Mind. MEER FRIENDS.
"I SHOULD HAVE CONFESSED TO HIM" ARC
Ok, so you think you like him (Correction: You know you like him. You confessed to everone you're crazy over him. You confessed to everyone except Him). Both of you are like stuck together, anywhere, everywhere. Everyone thinks you're together. (which also makes you think that you're somewhat special to this ungrateful son of a b*tch) *clear throats* Excuse me. Reality check: To him. You're just a good friend. Being such a desperado, you decided to say unnecessary things to him to see how he reacts to it (with an excuse of just trying to calm yourself down and make you feel better) "We should be bestfriends forever" is the sort of thing you tell him. (Which is so so so wrong. You can tell AFTER you get together maybe, but not before letting him know how you feel or the other way around.) You were expecting him to say "Why? I like you, we're like more than that.... " those sort of shit. Instead, he says "OK". You become depressed. Your soul crumbles like you're facing Death. (yeah, i know a bit dramatic.But well, local expression frust menonggeng) You should have confessed to him. (It may sound easy, but it's not. I know. ) Or instead of feeling like some loser shithead, you should at least explain to him the real situation, just to clear the water. Now, you can never be friends with the dude, hang out with him like usual, can't stick around with your other friends because he will be there because he hates you gutless. Just to be clear, it's not healthy to express your ridicule feelings on text. Some people will think you're a lunatic. And seriously, people will be sick and tired of you. It's a fact, face it.
"I NEED A SHOULDER (OR TWO) TO CRY ON" ARC
Ok. Over to the "friends will be there to support me" part. So he hates you. You don't know where to turn to. Only your friends and trusted ones. One day, you told this friend everything. She on the other hand did not make it easier for you (well, she did try her hardest to brick up the facts of the situation, and yet, you don't want to listen). Ok.. you did. You listened to her. You cried to her. She calls you and asks how you were and how things are going because she cared. What makes her sad was the fact that you told others that she's trying to mess up with your head, scolded you for being stupid (well you deserve it) and what you were expecting from her was words of comfort. Well, let's face it. This friend does not want to tell you the guy is a jerk. She wants you to know it yourself. You don't need to be told what is already known. You just need a smack in the head. Wake up and smell the concrete. Face the reality. You know she was right all along. But you just can't digest it. You don't want to. You are in denial. And you blame her. You can list down the many people you asked for advice for. But the one you truly want to hear it from is, this one friend. But did you listen? No. You only made her so hateful.
"HE'S JUST A MEMORY... NOT" ARC
To him, you're probably just a piece of toilet paper to wipe his ass with and you should clear your head once in a while to get the real picture. How many times does anyone need to remind you of this? When a guy told you that he 'can't stand the sight of you', that means you should leave him alone. Stop writing weird messages to him and don't start putting up ridiculous status on Friendster or Facebook. Try to put yourself in his shoes. I bet you feel irritated too. It's fucking annoying. Even those people who are not involve in that circle thinks it's irritating. What more with the 'Every-10seconds-status-update'. Try to divert your mind to something else. The more you try to pull him towards you, the more he'll run away. Take the theory of how a piece of rubberband works. The more you pull it the more it will pull away. (courtesy of dear friend, Nana - 2002). When you decided to forget about him, that means you won't keep on reminding yourself of that bastard. Take this for example: I've forgotten about you. Do you think you have been forgetting someone if you keep on having the thoughts of that person every second of the day? That is pure torture.
WORDS OF ADVICE OR WHATEVER
I'm gonna be frank. I don't care if it hurts anyone. Like hell I care. I'm just gonna spit the truth.
Stop being pathetic. The world doesn't revolve around you. Stop thinking that you're the most unfortunate piece of shit that's living in this world. Because you're not. Don't be so depressed because of an asshole. There are many other good guys out there that will treat you better than that bastard (as said above). Of course, anyone would be frustrated after being treated like that. But don't be depressed for too long, you're just wasting life. Enjoy life as much as you can. Take a vacation. Drive to the beach. Aromatherapy. Go to spa. Retail therapy. Don't wait for anyone to have fun. And the most important part, LISTEN TO WHAT PEOPLE HAVE TO SAY AND THINK OF WHAT YOU SHOULD DO. Don't go on listening and then talk shit about others. Well, some people can't do what I can. So it might not give the same result. Follow your own pace, but don't take too long and waste your time. There just might be someone for you around the corner. You'll never know.
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