I’m
sitting here at my cubicle, looking outside my office, staring at the
glistening droplets of rain on the window. It’s bright outside, yes, at the
same time, it’s very gloomy. I’m also currently listening to a loop of piano
playlist on my Spotify, in exchange for some peace of mind. Today, as usual,
just like every other year, I feel like it’s a great time for me to do some
self-reflection. It is the end of 2016 and we will be welcoming a new year very
soon (in another 12 days).
I will
be honest, my 2016 hasn’t been that good and hasn’t been that bad either, in
personal life, in work life, in social life. I would have to say, it’s balance.
Not sure if this is because of my age, that I’m getting old and that I think I
can handle life better (what the f is this bullshit?), but I think it’s more of
the experience that we’ve all gone through in life that taught us so many
things and that contributes to the patience and the perseverance, and that of
what we are built today. Anyway, this will be a very long entry (worth the 6
months since I neglected this blog ahahaha!)
1)
Personal life
Life has been great. Ups and downs,
what’s new? Nothing much achieved in terms of goal, but we have moved to a new
place and we bought a new car, monster truck and named it Black Hayate Go (as
in 5).
This year, I have lost my
Grandmother. She passed away in July. I managed to see her and spent some time
before her in May. I still can’t get over the lost. However, life goes on. My
best friend lost her father, my mom’s best friend lost her husband. Friends and
family mourning over losses. Let’s be thankful we are all still alive. Value
and treasure every single day and every single person we love.
I have to be honest, my husband and
I have been married for 2 years plus now and of course, we would love to have
kids. We have thought about it however, realistically, we have not really put
MUCH thought into it. We are more of those people who, if God grants us, we
will accept it with open arms and heart. I’m glad my husband, as well as my
family and in laws are understanding of this and let our decisions be ours and
not determined by what other people want. Sometimes, you can’t stop people from
talking about it, showing how “concern” they are that you are not carrying
around an extra bag full of milk and diapers, but hey, you keep your hands off
my business and we will still be friends okay?
Health wise, not really looking so
bright. I know it, I’m trying to be healthy, at the same time, my determination
is like those French butter in the sun. It melts quickly you don’t even know it
was there in solid form. We are now staying at a place with gym and a 50m pool.
But, still, I have no time for this. (You see why now?) Will definitely make do
all my wasted days fat-ting myself. (yes, fat-ting is now a word) I keep saying
I want to have a Journal on weight loss etc. But Bullshit. Let’s not make any
promises and see what’s going to happen. This will also determine
2)
Work life
Work sucks beginning of the year. I
did a lot of work for people and not being rewarded as promised, this made me
think people suck. I almost gave up on this place, until I had the opportunity
to move to a new team, new work and a more challenging setting. I’ve given
opportunity to do things that I’ve never done before. Spread my knowledge and
horizon to a new level. Learn so many things I’ve never thought I would be able
to do. Things are going great so far, and hopefully, I will get better
opportunity next year.
3)
Social life
I went to watch WEEZER! My
childhood dream. One of my favourite band that I grew up listening to (and what
makes me, ME). Rivers Cuomo was 10m away from me and I’m satisfied. Come on, be
thankful for what you get. Don’t be a bitch about it :D
Most importantly, I get to see
Weezer performed Buddy Holly, El Scorcho and Only In Dreams, with my best
friend, Momo. Life’s good.
I see friends (outside of work)
more often. People I know that I rarely see, I get to see them more now. At
least, I try to live outside of my normal life. I just hate to social with
people who talk about milk bottles, diapers and poop ALL THE TIME. Come on, you
know I don’t have kids and I don’t know shit about things you talk about. I
wish these people would be more respectful and sensitive of other people. Look,
I like you and your kid, but if you keep on yapping about them on Whatsapp or
everytime I see you, that’s it man. Forget we ever met.
Though so, I accept ideas,
suggestions (not judgements. Suggestions) and also appreciate friends who lend
their ears to listen to what I have to say about all this. LOLs. To those
friends that come over to hang out at our place, and stayed til dawn to play
games, gossip and have intellectual talks, thanks guys! I love you guys!
Wow. So much of self-reflection. As always, I thought it’s
useless to do more resolutions if the last ones were never fulfilled.
